i can be a really terrible blogger and it's not just because i have a tendency to obsess and then forget about things (although that has happened enough). in the recent events that i've been back at college, i've come to realize how severely unhappy with myself i can be. i've spent mornings dressing and undressing myself in clothes that i loved wheni bought it a week ago, only to feel like it's not longer fitting me correctly. i look at myself in the mirror and all i can see are the countless flaws that i'm going to have to cover up later in make up. i love make up and the idea of transforming yourself, but lately it's been more an issue of making me look like another person.
sometimes, i find it difficult to talk to people. it's like being back in high school and realizing that there are some people who are just never going to talk to you because they're too pretty, smart, talented etc, only to find out a bit too late that deep down they're thinking that about you too. i learnt my lesson back then but i feel like i'm slipping back into that shell.
and that's why i can be a bad blogger - while other passionate fashionistas are so keen to show of their outfits, i'm just terrified that someone out there may be judging me. maybe i hate myself to much to reveal my thoughts online.
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